The Premise of 52 New Friends


Last fall I had a revelation.  Something wonderful happened to me…and I had no one to share it with.

I am a forty-two year old, divorced, childless woman with a family that has done a very good job at alienating themselves from me.  If life were a big, patchwork quilt, I feel like my portion is a single, solitary patch that has been left on the floor and forgotten. 

And in quiet moments, I am lonely. 

I’m embarrassed to admit it but sometimes, I even feel sorry for myself.  Silence gives you plenty of time to pick apart all your flaws. 

Over the past two years, I’ve done a lot of online dating but frankly, I think the over-forty-and-single category needs more therapy than they do dates.  I’ll even include myself in that observation. 

And then, a few weeks ago, I went to a charity walk for suicide prevention.  I told myself I was there to support other people but as I stood in the crowd of nearly two thousand people who had gathered, I realized there are people who leave this world because they, too, pick apart their flaws in silence and in isolation…and little do they realize how much they are missed.  Maybe this world needs fewer meaningless dates and more real connections.  And maybe that needs to start with me.

So, for 2018, I have made a goal of developing 52 new connections in my life.  I will call them friends.  In this social experiment, I am hoping I can meet interesting people who may be different from me.  My intention is to listen and maybe enrich their life in some way, although, I would be open and grateful if they enriched mine.  And I’m going to blog about it each week which frankly, is a little unnerving.  I’m a planner and I have no idea where this is going to go.   But life is an adventure.  And so it begins…

Comments

  1. So excited to follow your stories each week, proud of you!❤️-Krista

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  2. The extrovert in me LOVES this. The introvert and person who’s been hurt by very close friends over the last 3-4 years, is saying, no way in hell.
    I can’t wait to read your blogs. I am extremely proud of you for this! Truthfully, I would love to be one of the people. I know we’re not a “new” connection, but the Julie I am now would love to get to know the YOU now. I love your fb posts and find you very intriguing and think you’d be someone i would like hanging out with. I’m ashamed i didn’t do that while we were growing up. And for that I’m very sorry. And the part about your family, that makes me sad and angry and i am sorry it’s that way. Blessings to you, my friend. Enjoy this! �� Julie Zieman Davis

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    Replies
    1. Julie - You touch my heart! When we were growing up, I always regarded you with the highest esteem. I was so busy trying to be perfect back then that if you had known me better, you probably wouldn't have liked me very much anyway. You owe me no apologies.

      And I will say that although I am a poor judge of character when inviting people into my life, I'm also quick not to KEEP bad people in my life. Of course, everyone is different but by building a wall to keep people out who might hurt you, you also keep out those who would do you only good. Why make someone worthy climb over all the dead bodies of those that have hurt you before?

      Maybe one day we will have the opportunity as adults to get to know each other better. I would like that. Big hugs to you! And remember that you are, and have always been, a lovely person.

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  3. I think you are awesome and brave and I wish you did not feel lonely but here you go solving things again. Like you do.

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  4. I think that this is fabulous. After all, I met you after waiting on you at the pizza and wine bar, and we've been friends ever since. Please do share your amazingness with the world. You may sometimes be alone, but, I promise you, there are many of us who are there with you in spirit. The world can be a very dark place and often a lonely place as well. I just want you to know that I'm still here if you need a friend even though I now live freakin' far away. I'm so proud of you for coming up with this idea, and I can't wait to see what these friend meet ups turn into, just be careful though as well. Hugs and love your way!
    Love, Amy Callaway

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