Friend #7 - Adrian

I did it.  I did the thing I said I was not going to do. 

I don’t know if it was because Valentine’s Day was coming up.  Maybe I just ran into one too many happy couples…but the old, lonely hole opened up in my heart reminding me I’m a single.  And then I got the itch to want to shop the dating sites.  I tried to resist.  For hours, I begged the television to entertain me but the pull was just too great.  I’d done a very good job at deleting all of my information on the dating sites so I didn’t have access.  It took some work to put up a new profile with no photo, no description, just meant to look, but moments into the process I realized…I wasn’t missing much.  I was just about to log out when I noticed someone had sent me a message. 

It was harmless enough, just a question about the screen name I chose.  I looked at his profile.  It said he was open to making new friends so I figured…why not?  Here’s a guy willing to take a chance not even knowing what I look like.  And that’s how I met Adrian.

We chose to meet at a Mexican restaurant in Mesa.  Adrian said he grew up just across the canal, but that was a different time when Mesa was considered rural.  My first impression was that he was meek and mild mannered with a soft voice, not a bad looking guy, but just underneath the surface I could feel a controlled anger, seeping around the edges like a noxious gas.  He said his brother had just sent him a text that ticked him off so it is entirely possible that I caught him in a bad moment in time.  But even if it was just the moment, Adrian still has a lot to be angry about. 

He has primary custody of his children, ages thirteen, eleven and nine because their mother’s boyfriend physically and emotionally abused them.  His youngest is special needs so every day at 3 pm Adrian has to be there to meet the bus, which means he can really only work five hours a day.  It’s hard to get ahead on a schedule like that.  And to make matters worse, his ex-wife refuses to pay child support…yet still manages to drive a Mercedes. 

And he’s a talented guy.  For a lot of his life, he’s been a contractor.  He showed me photos of his work.  I could see in the photos his precision and creativity.  He has also designed swimwear and from those photos, I couldn’t tell the difference between his work and Victoria’s Secret.  Without saying it, I sensed a sensitive, creative soul, but his most incredible talent may be something called KST. 

“KST is a healing protocol used to locate and correct/release areas of blockage, distortion, subluxation, interference, stagnation and other stresses in the body and body/mind that are often missed by most healthcare professionals,” according to the website, www.korenspecifictechnique.com.  As I sat across from Adrian at dinner, he began examining me in what almost seemed like a trance.  He noted three places on my body that were out of whack including my collar bone, my hip bone and the bones in my right foot.  I hadn’t told him I’m a runner that often leads with my right foot and he never moved from his side of the table to look at my hip or my feet.  He also showed me testimonials of people he has helped.  As strange as it sounds, I believed him.  I believe he does have a gift.

Before Adrian and his ex wife had children, they lived in New Mexico.  He found work in a restaurant, hoping to one day become a chef.  He started as a host, was quickly promoted to a waiter and then within two months, was running the entire operation.  The customers loved him!  They were important people in the community who came in specifically to request his service.  It was the happiest time in Adrian’s life.  One day, the owner came to him and offered him a house and a forty thousand dollar a year salary to try to persuade Adrian to stay instead of going to culinary school, but one of the chefs took Adrian aside.  His coworker told him the owner planned to turn him into a slave to the restaurant, a position Adrian would never be able to leave, no matter how resentful he eventually became.  So Adrian turned the offer down.  He said he now regrets that decision.

Adrian also has some interesting ideas about life, in general.  He believes people should not be dependent on other sources for their nourishment, in case the worst happens.  He has a strong belief in Bitcoin as the currency of the future and he is curious about other subversive rumors that seem to forecast a bleak future.  He is also vehemently repulsed by the entitled.  Adrian’s grandmother came to this country from Mexico after the Mexican Revolution.  All of the men in her family had been killed and she spent her life in labor camps migrating from Arizona to California to pick crops.  She worked hard and instilled that work ethic in her family.  “No one is owed anything” Adrian said …but on that point...I think he is wrong.

We are all owed respect.  And we all deserve to be seen, something I don’t think Adrian has personally experienced very often.  I think his natural meekness has caused him to blend into the crowd.  I think the jeers and the put-downs and the under-the-breath slurs people have cast upon him have damaged his sensitive soul to the point that he puts on a coat of anger in order to reject people before they reject him.  That way it doesn’t hurt so much.  I think he’s angry because deep down he knows he is worthy and talented, but he doesn’t know how to make other people see it.  I think his entire being is screaming out to be recognized for the talented individual he is.  And yes, he does have some unusual beliefs but the greatest minds in history did too. 

I hugged him goodbye in the dark parking lot of that Mexican restaurant in Mesa, knowing it wasn’t a love connection, knowing he probably already felt rejected by me, but I also really wanted to help him.  I wanted him to know that someone really listened and appreciated him for the man he is.  His real passion is healing people who are in pain and I think if there were more people who could see his abilities, the healer, in essence, would be healed.  I believe there is a lot of love in this world.  Adrian just hasn’t had enough of his share of it. 

P.S.  His kst sessions are very reasonably priced so if you are in pain or know someone who is, reach out to me in the comments section and I will pass along his contact information.