Friend #33 - Nancy

Four months ago, Nancy got laid off from her job. 

She had been dealing with an abnormal mammogram for months and finally had surgery to remove her lymph nodes to solve the problem.  Her boss called her two days after her surgery to let her know that she had been let go. 

Nancy had spent years at that company working as a recruiter in the financial industry, ensuring new recruits that it was a great company to work for, yet all the while knowing that those who were rude, malicious and back-stabbing where the ones who were most likely to get promoted.  It was a toxic environment.  Nancy admitted she probably should have left long ago. 

Over the past few years, changes in the financial industry had caused lay-offs at her company.  Only they weren’t massive layoffs that caused hysteria.  It was sneaky.  Once, Nancy talked to Fred on Monday and by Thursday she was getting bounce back emails.  The layoffs were seemingly random.  They even took those who were good at their jobs and those with massive, impeccable amounts of experience.  So it wasn’t a complete surprise that Nancy was laid off.  It was upsetting that it occurred while Nancy was lying in bed, two days out of surgery and feeling most vulnerable.  It was also upsetting because now she doesn’t have the steady medical insurance she once had.  It was as if everything stable had the carpet ripped right out from under it.

So Nancy found solace in the thing that has always brought her peace:  dogs.  She is part of that five percent of people who don’t just love animals.  She has been fostering them for rescue groups for as long as she can remember.  And like a lot of other animal advocates, pit bulls are one of those breeds that pull on her heart strings.  In fact, she once volunteered to foster a pit bull, fell in love with her and then the organization that had pulled the dog from the shelter mysteriously disappeared.  So Nancy kept the dog and has loved her for years…even though the dog has caused havoc with parts of Nancy’s life.

For the past nine years, Nancy has been seeing someone one and off.  At one point, Nancy’s boyfriend moved in with her and her pit bull…and that’s when things began to go sour.  For reasons Nancy can’t fathom, her boyfriend has decided that pit bulls are dangerous and there is no moving him from that position.  In the end, it finally came down to the boyfriend or the dog.  Nancy didn’t want to make the decision.  In her heart, she realized that people should come before animals.  But she isn’t just a regular animal lover.  She is one of those people that go above and beyond.  It’s what she loves to do.  And she finally decided that anyone who truly loves her wouldn’t ask her to give up something she loved so much.

So the boyfriend moved out. 

Right now, Nancy is in a state of transition.  I’m excited for her!  She’s seems less excited.  Lol.  But it’s likely just the fear of the unknown. 

For a lot of years, I think Nancy has lived in an emotional purgatory where things haven’t been so bad that it would cause her to let them go…but they haven’t been so good that it has brought her the happiness and joy she deserved either.  I think a lot of us settle for mediocre things in our lives.  I know I certainly have.  Sometimes, there has to be a shake up: a breakup, a loss of a job, a health issue or something big that causes us to step back and re-evaluate our lives and what makes us happy. 

I think Nancy is in that place.  I just want her to laugh more.  I want her to smile.  I want her to find other things in her life that she can love as much as the dogs she fosters.  I’ve spent a lot of time with those in the rescue community and one thing I’ve noticed is that those that rescue often treat the animals in their care like the innocent part of themselves that has once been hurt or rejected.  I don’t know if this is the case with Nancy or not, but I do know that anyone with a heart as large as hers deserves more respect and happiness than she’s been given.